I just cannot seem to reconcile "wet" with "summer". For me, summer equates to blue skies, the kind of blue that hurts one's eyes with its brightness, and occasionally framed by fluffy white clouds with nary a gray tinge. Summer equals dry, blistering heat -- the type of heat that makes one think of an oven, but at the same time conjures up images of azure waves and damp sand that sticks onto one's feet.
Perhaps the remainder of this summer will just be wet, damp, and cloudy.
We'll find ways to enjoy and be thankful:
- That the worst of the heat will be chased off by the rains, so we at least avoid heat-stroke
- That the farmers and their fields can have the welcome moisture and water for the growing plants
- That the weather just helps us feel cozier when just sitting by at home
- That children can play in the rain for longer periods while it is still their summer vacation.
Today is Mother's Day. I woke up in a bit of a snit because I really wanted to go out and have a nice lunch somewhere, like Tagaytay. But last night the conversations didn't seem to be going that way (to my mind, at least). And so I left the bed with a bit of a heavy heart.
I then asked Hubby what time he had slept, since I knew last night was a big night in their online gaming community (battles, spies, attacks -- it's a totally different, parallel world for them!). He cited a fairly reasonable time (for a weekend, that is). At least that didn't add fuel to my fire.
Then he asked me to go to the living room. And I saw a bouquet of flowers for me. Hubby and our older daughter had gotten out of the house at 5:30 in the morning to go and pick out flowers. I'm now sure if they were quite stealthy about it or if I was just completely zonked out, but I did not hear anything, not even when they came back. And I am normally a light sleeper.
My huffy mood evaporated, just like that. It reminded me that the signs of appreciation that I wanted can and will manifest themselves in ways that I will not always expect, but will always make me thankful.
- For a little girl who would willingly give up her early morning sleep just to pick and choose the colors and flowers for her mother
- For a husband who plays online games instead of having any vices, and who was ready to trade those gaming moments to go out and get me flowers
- For this day that is dedicated to Mothers.
Today is Mother's Day. I am thankful for having two daughters of my own, who give me great joy and at times, great frustration as well, but I'll take the whole package.
This is also the first Mother's Day that I will celebrate without my own mother.
Almost a year has gone by now, and for the most part the pain of her passing on has subsided to a dull ache. For the past week though I have been thinking of her a lot more than usual, remembering conversations we'd had, events we participated in, food that she cooked.
These memories are all I have now, all that I can share with my own daughters on what kind of person their grandmother was.
It's been almost a year now, and yet I still sometimes ask myself: Has it been a year already?
I still miss you Mama.
